More Than a Woman

As a female columnist, I can't critique Caitlin Moran without feeling like I'm a busker yelling notes to Hendrix. My notes are useless, and ultimately, she can't hear me. My interest in feminism began largely because Caitlin Moran wrote How To Be A Woman ten years ago, and I've had a career in journalism that largely exists because Moran helped establish a category that made it possible. The cultural debt I owe to Moran is insurmountable, and even though I don't read her so much these days, I still count myself a fan.<br /><br />More Than A Woman could not possibly live up to the fanfare of How To Be A Woman. The endless jokes about her pussy that seemed radical in 2010 now feel a bit embarrassing, a bit 'Viz', a bit 'Dad at the wedding'. There are times, particularly in the first 50 pages, that the book feels more Live At The Apollo than like the memoir/manifesto she has become so good at producing. However, when you push past that first act, Moran reaches something deeper, softer and higher than the places she went in HTBAW. At it's heart, this book is about the cost of love. The cost of caring. The exhausting of having to always be the person who cares, who loves, and the fact that society hinges on women and our continued decision to love and to care well into old age. Moran's chapters on her daughters are genuinely moving, as are her insights on ageing parents, the failed marriages of those around her, the quiet that comes when girls grow up. <br /><br />How To Be A Woman was written by a 30-something, but was read largely and cultishly followed by 20-somethings. With More Than A Woman, I predict the same thing will happen: those aged girls, now in their 30s (hello) will look at this as a manual for how to enter the next phase of their lives. And on the whole, I think it will make those lives a little easier to process.

The book started off rubbing me the wrong way. <br /><br />The author and I are the same age and she started the book lamenting about the aches and pains everyone her age is feeling. She particularly focused on a hip pain she had, and I was doing all sorts of internal eye-rolling. And what happened? Not 24 hours later and I woke up with hip pain – serves me right for hip-shaming her.<br /><br />Only after the first 20% did the book take off for me but after that I loved everything about it. Even if a big chunk is written about and from the perspective of a parent. Seeing that I do not have children I could not necessarily relate but did not find this alienating at all.<br /><br />This is my 5th book by Caitlin Moran and I really love her brand of feminism and commentary about socio economic issues. <br /><br />She is a bit crass, a bit in your face and I do not always agree with her on everything (no dungarees are NOT suitable for anyone over the age of 5) but there are some beautiful poignant sections I will want to listen to again.<br /><br />She not only talks about what it means to be a middle aged woman juggling demanding teenagers, a marriage, elderly parents, but also about what beauty really means, how gender stereotypes hurt women AND men, eating disorders and body image.<br /><br />This is a witty life affirming book by a woman who calls a vagina by its rightful name, who is not shy to talk about difficult things and who admits that she still does not know everything.<br /><br />Audio highly recommended

Caitlin Moran writes from her own experiences, and there is usually some common thread that makes it enjoyable for readers from many backgrounds and experiences. This book, however, is probably interesting and relatable if you are a straight, middle-class married woman with children and the privilege of working from home (not Covid-19 enforced). I am not, and round that much of the book was difficult to connect to, and even the humor escaped me. Moran also felt very outdated and privileged in many of her commentaries.<br /><br />This just wasn't for me.

Моран полюбилась многим за свой подростковый мемуар о том, как сложно быть девочкой, и вот сюрприз: женщиной быть еще сложнее. <br /><br />Я не очень люблю, когда в книгах постоянно и до изнеможения шутят (Эми Шумер, Адам Кей, Кэрри Фишер etc) и потому первые главы не испытывала ничего, кроме раздражения, и чуть было не бросила читать. А потом Моран заговорила о работающих матерях.<br /><br />Это больная тема для всех работающих и семейных, и если вам кажется, что на эту тему уже все написано, все-таки прочитайте Моран. С юмором, но вполне серьезно она рассказывает, что настоящий стеклянный потолок женщины — это человек, за кого она вышла замуж. Именно от него будут зависеть ваши будущие возможности для самореализации, если вы оба планируете размножаться. Будем честными, забота о детях по-прежнему в основном лежит на плечах женщин, а капиталистическое общество радостно эксплуатирует естественные инстинкты защищать, любовь женщин к своим детям. Пройдет еще десяток лет, внезапно постареют родители — и вот такая мать, жонглирующая семьей и работой, превратится в sandwich carer, и даже если у нее есть братья, то забота о пожилых родственниках тоже, скорее всего, ляжет на женщину, "ведь у тебя гораздо лучше это получается!". Угу.<br /><br />Другая потрясающая глава — о том, как дочь Моран внезапно заболела анорексией. Как сначала вы утешаете грустного ребеночка и предлагаете ему, разумеется, запить ��се горести чаем, а потом ребеночек не ест неделями, режет руки, и посреди ночи в больнице вы гладите ее по бледному лбу и с ужасом думаете, неужели она действительно больше не хочет жить.<br /><br />В общем, взрослая книга про взрослую женскую жизнь. Честная, не приукрашенная. Но местами смешная до ужаса. Очень здоровская. Особенно я бы мужчинам рекомендовала. Женщины и так многое из этого знают.

So here’s the thing - objectively this book is funny and insightful and so well written I want to befriend the author and convince her to narrate my life. <br />But! This is not a community &amp; culture book. This is a memoir because no matter how relatable it is, it casts tooooooo many generalization on what it’s like to be a woman or more than a woman. It’s almost the exact opposite of the X+Y book I read last month. It might be accurate and it is shedding light on certain issues that no one talks about, but it’s not about all women... it describes a very specific type of women: middle-aged, middle-class western, generally straight or straight passing mothers. <br />And that was expected from her precious book in which she makes fun of the miracle that childbirth is while still describing it as a miracle and the beginning of the most important thing a woman can do - be a mother. So, no surprises that after another decade of raising children she writes about it, because they say write what you know and I have no doubt she knows what it’s like to be a mother.<br />So, if you are, like I am, willing to ignore that motive, and read for the sake of learning what it’s like and why you maybe shouldn’t do it, then it’s a perfectly acceptable book, let’s just call it autobiographical humor rather than a feminist non fiction

Lo he leído y me he sentido tan identificada en tantas partes... y he visto a mis amigas identificadas en tantas otras... He subrayado tanto como solo me pasa con los libros de esta mujer. La maternidad, las amigas, la lista de cosas inútiles que tienes en casa, el puritanismo estadounidense, el techo de cristal, la dependencia económica de las mujeres respecto de sus parejas, la belleza vista por una misma y no por cómo nos ven los demás, estar a gusto con tu cuerpo, la sobrecarga de trabajo (de cuidado de hijos, de trabajo de casa) que sufren las mujeres, los problemas de los hijos (angustioso leer sobre el trastorno alimentario de su hija y sus intentos de suicidio), el feminismo, la vida en pareja, los incels (y por qué no hay chicas incels que odien a los hombres porque ellas no tienen sexo), el cansancio, la decepción, los aquelarres de amigas... A veces pienso que Caitlin Moran me conoce y escribe sobre mí, y luego me doy cuenta de que no, de que escribe sobre todas nosotras, madres, hijas, amigas, amantes, esposas, trabajadoras, cuidadoras, monitoras de tiempo libre. Porque, al fin y al cabo, hay problemas universales que solo sufrimos la mitad de la población mundial, esas somos las mujeres.

I wasn't wild about the first chapter or so - it just felt a bit like CM was trying too hard. But I'm so happy I stuck with this audio as the rest of the book more than makes up for the over the top start.<br /><br />Being the same age as the author, there was so much I could relate to. Although she has a brilliant sense of humor, and had me smiling most of the time, there were also some chapters that had me swallowing back tears, most notably The Hour of Missing the Children and The Hour of "What about the Men". <br /><br />I loved that More Than a Woman included humor, brilliant ideas and thoughts around feminism as well as personal anecdotes, often funny but sometimes deeply sad and moving. <br /><br />If you are in your forties and don't mind swearing or some crassness, I highly recommend that you listen to the audio version for a funny, life-affirming and wise look at what it means to be a middle aged women in this day and time.

This was the first of Caitlin Moran’s books that I’ve read. It’ll probably be the last (never say never). With all of the child prodigy mythology that she’s wrapped in, I was quite staggered to discover that her style is stream of uninformed consciousness. You’re trapped in her brain for a couple of hours. There’s no reference to any research on the myriad topics she covers - just her own thoughts on them all. You don’t come out the other side having learned anything. Just a faint feeling that you simply paid to hang out with her for a couple of hours. I’m not used to this approach, and I find it odd that one can publish a book on the basis of being a friendly, chatty kind of person. Like anyone might, she wanders across some interesting territory in the 252 pages; but it’s pretty banal. She tells it like she sees it, as a privileged, white, cis woman. For all of her talk of being a supportive hag, she appears oblivious to the struggles of anyone outside her small world, and has nothing to offer them. This book is definitely for those on the inside looking in.

I cannot be unbiased about Caitlin Moran. She is one of the literary lights of my life. I love this book and her. She is my role model. I'm so happy she exists. I want her to write and release journalism/autobiography/social observation novels forever.

This is a poignant and relevant piece of writing for any woman in their mid-40s to 50s and beyond, and for those who live with them. Or work with them, or drink with them, or (more likely, as the filter thins with age) has had a run-in with them. <br />I’ve followed the work of Caitlin Moran since her earlier works, in addition to the amusing, based loosely on their upbringing, TV series ‘Raised By Wolves’ (no, not *that* one, you’ll have to research with UK TV series added to your search), and as we’re similarly aged, her books do touch a nerve through the ages and stages of our lives.<br />This is in turn funny, thought-provoking, and sad, expecially as she, towards the last third of the book, details her daughter’s journey through depression/anxiety/eating disorder/self-harm (therefore, TW for all of these things advised), and how the family gets through, especially as a mother, watching your child in pain.<br />The latter part deals with the role of women as perceived by society - how we’re the carers (again, society’s lowest paid and barely noticed job), if we’re not caring for children, it’s the ageing parents +/- in-laws, then grandchildren and the partner. That’s not even starting on the associated issues where there’s disability, poverty, life stress, all which the woman must factor into her decisions and plans. She quite rightly points out that the unchilded women are perceived as selfish, because who will look after them when they’re old “You must, brutally, breed your own carers.” A quick retrospective of my life shows that yes, I did the bulk of the child caring, but when I was in our business and my husband at home, he was ‘babysitting’ as the customers referred to it. To which I pointed out that I’m not paying him $20/hour to do what I’ve done for years for free. But do I expect free elder care when I’m in need? They’ll have to find me (and their inheritance) first!<br />Finally, she identifies our support network - our hags. For we are women on the outer of society because we are no longer young (and therefore beautiful), not relevant because we’ve childed already, invisible due to the bodily changes of age, and viewed with scepticism due to our propensity to say what we think. To be honest, companies need to stop emailing me with surveys ‘How Did We Do?’ Because I’ll tell them. <br />So, collect your hags, take time for yourself, and appeciate all you’ve come to be. And await the next life stage from Ms Moran.