Sorted: Growing Up, Coming Out, and Finding My Place

UPDATING THIS REVIEW BECAUSE I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAD TO WATCH THE PUBLISHING VIDEO TO REALIZE THAT THE NAME OF THE BOOK IS A HARRY POTTER REFERENCE <br /><br />Is writing this review just an excuse not to study for Microeconomics? Absolutely but let's do this! <br /><br />I've been following Jackson Bird for a while now. I do have to admit I probably haven't watched most of his videos, I'm not the most serious of followers but I've definitely binge-watched some of his stuff. That area of Youtube that's full of trans things is great. Even though I'm usually a little skeptical of Youtuber memoirs (dude, you're 25, isn't it too early to write a memoir?), I felt this was one of the best I've ever read. <br /><br />It's accessible, Jackson's voice comes across clearly, the Harry Potter references are on point and it really does express a lot of important ideas. Seeing his journey is really cool, I felt like it was great to see him live out his dreams. <br /><br />There's a guy in my course who, based on his facebook updates, believes that the story about that parent from Canada who one day decided to live life as a 6 year old girl is an example of what all trans people are. I'd comment on his status but I don't even know where to begin (trans people don't believe they're changing their age? why couldn't you transition and continue parenting your child? if people are transiting that late, it's often because transitioning was inaccessible to them when they were younger, surely this means we should make transitioning more available and well known so that people won't reach their 50s and still feel ashamed about their gender identity?). <br /><br />My point here is that there is a ton more of education to do and Jackson does it really well. In between his personal story, he weaves brief explanations. I felt they were really friendly and helpful. I don't think I've ever read a trans guy biography so this was really cool!<br /><br />I loved seeing how easily I could relate to some of the moments here. I remember the first time I cut my hair short and told people it was because of the army. I can relate to how it felt to learn that you can be attracted to more than one gender, to learn that the way you feel inside is right. I think the descriptions here are so accurate. <br /><br />I'm kind of in this midst of my own gender crisis (yep, again) so I was interested in this book to help me see again where I am. I mean, I'm sure that I'm not a guy or a girl and I know that nonbinary is probably the best way for me to express what I feel but recently, with starting over in uni, I've been struggling with a lot of dysphoria again and quite a lot of confusion about physically transitioning (I think a highlight of this crisis was when I realized I don't want to die before doing top surgery, that I would hate for my body to look like this after I die). <br /><br />And yeah, I should probably just gather the courage to go to a gender therapist and figure this out there instead of writing goodreads reviews but regardless, Jackson writes, "When I thought about a life lived in between the lines, using "they" and "them" pronouns, always subject to strangers' confusion and judgement, I knew that it wasn't who I was." Somehow, this quote really sums up the problem because truly, I just want to live a life without gender but it feels so impossible. <br /><br />I realize that that this quote is entirely about his own subjective feelings but still, after so many months of speaking English, of not needing to feel my gender every time someone speaks to me, suddenly, all of this is way too overwhelming and just so highly uncomfortable and yet, the alternative of coming out and forcing people to use pronouns that don't feel intuitive for a Hebrew speaker is somehow even worse. <br /><br />A few weeks ago, I had to pick a subject to focus on in the Israeli-German conference. There was a group that was focusing on LGBT+ issues. I found myself frozen with indecision because I <i>should</i> sign up to the LGBT+ group, because I knew that the vast majority of Germans have never met an Israeli nonbinary, and let alone one that's also religious. I knew that I could have contributed to that group, that I'd say my usual spiel about being queer in the army, about coming out of the closet to my parents, about healthcare and people would find it interesting.<br /><br />However, there was also a group about globalization and to me, those questions about identity and nationality simply spoke more. Ultimately, even though before this summer, I know I would have picked the LGBT+ group, after spending 3 months talking about queer Israeli-ness, I signed up for the globalization team. And it was awesome.<br /><br />In the conference itself, I met a few Germans that were part of the LGBT+ group. As I'd expected, there were no nonbinary participants and when I'd told them I was nonbinary, their response was, "You should have joined our group!" and then promptly asked me all of the usual questions. I don't mean to be ungrateful and I'm happy for the chance to advocate for something I believe in but still, it just feels like I'm not that investing in my queerness, that I would much rather be known for my thoughts on how to solve the middle eastern conflict/s than the fact that I don't identify with a gender. <br /><br />I spent this summer being very outwardly trans. I do think this was a good thing as 2 fifteen year olds came out of the closet to me as trans for the first time. One of them said that seeing me, an "adult" live life as a nonbinary makes them feel like they can do it too. Beyond the hilarity of seeing me as an adult, I think I've learned that that's just not me. I'm not interested in pouring so much of my identity into being "Israeli Jewish nonbinary", even if I am all of those things and happy to be them. <br /><br />So, rant aside, this is a good book. And I figure that in a few weeks, I'll settle down here and it'll all seem so meaningless. <br /><br /><b> What I'm Taking With Me </b><br />- Harry Potter has essentially changed Jackson Bird's life in more ways that I can count.<br />- The writing here is so good, a perfect blend of humor and friendliness. <br />- Can we all acknowledge that Jackson is just annoying attractive? Like what even is this<br /><br /><i> Uni Adventures, week 5(?) </i><br />- I went to the queer sorority (although they're hardly a sorority, they're more like a "let's hang out sometimes, watch drag and do activism" group) and now there are a few more friendly faces on campus, including a really lovely girl! <br />- We're going to be writing together the paper for politics, something that should be kinda fun. <br />- Even though I absolutely despise team projects, maybe I've improved at this since high school.<br />- My closest friend from class calls people "love of my life" unironically and it's the best thing ever.<br />- She is also a slytherin in denial so this should be interesting, as I am such a hufflepuff. <br />- Logics class is so wild, it can be summed up by a guy suddenly asking, "but what's the point? Why? What are we doing?" and the lecturer just staring at him for a few moments. <br />- Amartya Sen, a man I have never heard of, was mentioned 3 times this week in three very different contexts (econ, ppe and political science) and suddenly I feel like I've known of him my whole life. <br />- I applied for Reservists on Duty and got rejected. On one hand, I get it. In the workshop, I said that I believe in listening to BDS, that I think we will change people's opinions of Israel through friendly conversations (and not through debating). I also ended up interrupting a guy that was speaking and came across as too talkative. <br />-On the other hand, I also don't look the type. In fact, I usually more get read as someone that would take part in BDS, as an anti-Zionist. And like, I want to believe that this isn't why I got rejected. <br />- In any case, I'm gonna be proud of myself for sharing my rejection. I feel like that's something that I've always struggled with and heck yeah, telling the people who were with me in the workshop that I didn't pass was not as hard as I thought it would be. <br />- My roommate and I are getting along really well. The only challenge is that she has been learning Hebrew and occasionally says words in Hebrew. My brain gets so confused and I'm always seconds away from speaking to her in Hebrew back.

I am delighted I had the opportunity to read this. The odds of me bumping into it on my own were pretty slim: I am not well up on YouTube or podcasts or TED talks.<br />Bird is great at what he does: educate in a friendly, relatable, utterly non-threatening way on a topic probably everyone has questions about. This is a book one could recommend to any reader of any age, knowledge, or receptiveness. By staying firmly grounded in, well, the etiquette of supporting trans men and women as well as those who identify as non-binary or genderqueer, Bird reframes the subject. To be clear, he isn't defensive in any way, nor is he argumentative. He just never entertains the idea that anyone should be thought less than.<br />Just recently J.K. Rowling has tweeted and published an essay of poorly-reasoned prejudice. This is not some kind of rebuttal to unthinking cruelty. Bird is beyond that: there is no question that people have the perfect right to choose their gender, if any, and use the restrooms of choice. These are human rights that all people enjoy. He addresses the real questions, such as, what is a thoughtful gift to commemorate a man's first testosterone injection? Or how can you best affirm how delighted you are that your loved one is finally able to live in joy as the person they are?<br />There are many good resources for activism and education, which Bird helpfully includes. His genius and skill is a light tone and a celebration of kindness and caring.<br />Possibly the most wholesome and kind book one will read this year. I wish Mr. Bird all the best, confident that he has earned it.<br /><br />Goodreads giveaway.

The story of a trans man who grew up deeply closeted in Texas, didn't even really learn about the LGBT community until college, and eventually came out publicly after graduating from undergrad. Along the way he experienced periods of joyful friendship and periods of depression, and found community volunteering for the organization formerly known as The Harry Potter Alliance (now FandomForward.org). Jackson was ran their youtube series as a volunteer before being hired fulltime as part of their social media team, so when he did come out, he had to do so publicly to his followers as well as to his friends and family. I listened to the audiobook read by the author which is only about 6 hours. It's written in an accessible style and the story moves fairly quickly.

Really enjoyed this memoir - I was familiar with Jackson through the HPA and I’ve been meaning to read this for ages. My dear friend and I chose to pause in our HP reread, and are gonna read this for Pride Month instead! We haven’t officially started (I think...) but SORRY FOR STARTING/FINISHING IT BEFORE YOU ??

Very good audiobook narrated by the author himself about his life, growing up, facing internalized transphobia and dealing with body dysphoria, finding his career path and being his true self. I feel like it’s a good memoir to learn about trans experiences for a cis person (like myself) as well as to be seen and to learn for trans people or people questioning their gender.<br />I do appreciate that the author points that it’s just his story, it’s not a universal trans experience and as he is bi trans white man from a relatively good family his experiences could vary from those of people of color and other different marginalized communities, different intersections.<br /><br />The book is full of humor, it’s very entertaining to listen to. On more somber parts the narration stays engaging and captivating.<br />Considering recent events it was jarring to hear so many HP &amp; JKR references. Can’t imagine how the author himself feels about it now.<br /><br />Anyways, highly recommend! Very easy to listen to and a very good introduction to learning about trans experiences for cis folks and questioning their gender.<br /><br />CW: dysphoria, internalized transphobia, brief mention of past toxic relationship, discussion of top surgery &amp; the surgery itself.

I could not stop listening to this memoir. Jackson shared his challenging, and at times painful, journey with the same positive and informative voice that I heard in his YouTube videos when I watched them years ago.

4.5 ? rating

*I received a copy of Sorted from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review*<br /><br />After reading several "YouTuber" books over the years, it's safe to say Sorted by Jackson Bird is the most well written and researched one yet. Part memoir and part educational guide, Sorted is Jackson's story discovering that he is trans. As a viewer of Jackson's YouTube channel, this book helped me understand his journey in a new way, and have an even deeper respect for what he and other trans people face growing up and becoming themselves. That being said, I highly recommend reading this book even if you've never heard of Jackson, as it is a great resource for learning more about the LGBTQ+ community.<br /><br />It's easy for me to connect with Jackson because we are the same age and share some of the same interests. When he discusses attending the Harry Potter releases, for example, I can remember when I was doing the same with my friends. I can also relate to feeling uncomfortable in my body, and not knowing exactly how gender plays a part in my self identity. Over the years I've gone through extremely girly phases and tomboy phases, too. My favorite colors have gone from pink to blue to green. As I turn 30 in just a few weeks, I realize I haven't worn a dress in years and have no desire to do so again (at least for the foreseeable future). I think my fluid ideas of gender and expression allowed me to sink into this book easily. I really appreciate Jackson's candidness in sharing the struggles he went through growing up.<br /><br />My critiques of Sorted are marginal at best. The book opens with a set of disclaimers from Jackson that I truly don't believe are necessary. You don't need to tell me that this is your story and it is not representative of all trans people - it's your memoir! Of course it only represents your life. I understand the desire for such disclaimers, but I wish people didn't feel the need to use them.<br /><br />Similarly, this book includes educational passages in the middle of Jackson's personal narrative. These passages are very helpful and add a lot to the book, but I found them to be a bit repetitive. For example, Jackson repeated definitions and other key points a few times. I believe he did so in order to stress importance, but because terms are included in a dedicated glossary, I don't think the repetition is necessary.<br /><br />Overall, I am so glad I read Sorted and hope more people will pick up this book. It is extremely approachable if you are new to the trans community, and I believe that reading Jackson's story can help to demonstrate what trans people experience when trying to understand more about themselves and their gender. Sorted also provides many resources for further study, and I appreciate the amount of work Jackson put into this book. I look forward to watching more of his videos, and seeing what is ahead for him!

I really enjoyed this transgender memoir, and I really enjoy Jackson Bird, as it turns out! <br /><br />Before we get to the millionaire-author-sized elephant in the room, this is a pretty basic memoir about Jackson's life from birth to his late twenties, with a specific focus on his struggles with gender and sexuality before finally coming out as a trans man at age 25. <br /><br />This was an extremely solid book, told with clear uncomplicated prose, and an impressive sense of self-reflection. As a cis person, I can't speak for the material, but I have read quite a few books by trans people about their experiences at this point, and a lot of it did feel very familiar. This is mostly likely because Jackson isn't writing to other trans people as his primary audience, but to cis people. He wants to educate and humanize trans people by putting his story out there, but also because he says how important it would have been to have a book like this when he was growing up. His story is emotionally affecting and he tells it well, so even if you are disappointed by the book not being a revolutionary piece of work, there's still a nice story here. <br /><br />And now, for the unfortunately and ironic title of the book. Jackson was a big name in Harry Potter fandom, and he worked for the Harry Potter Alliance (a non-profit) for years. The book is structured around the idea that gender in the real world can be compared for educative purposes to the Hogwarts Houses. The quote that opens the book is from Dumbledore, saying, "I sometimes think we Sort too soon." This metaphor works well. Unfortunately in 2022, knowing that the person responsible for creating Jackson's beloved story (and mine) is transphobic and openly dismissive of Jackson's gender and experiences gives the whole thing a bitter edge it didn't have when it was initially published in 2019.<br /><br />Still, this is worth reading, and the audiobook was a good choice, as it's read by the author, and he does a really good job.<br /><br />[3.5 stars]<br /><br /><b>Read Harder Challenge 2022:</b> Read a memoir by someone who is trans or nonbinary.

this was a really great memoir and I'm so happy I read it! I found myself relating to parts of it since I'm transmasculine for all intents and purposes and I always love when that happens in memoirs. I look forward to watching Jackson's YouTube videos, since I didn't know he was a YouTuber until I read this book and I'm also really glad he narrated it himself. He did a wonderful job.